Quest

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Photo by Ty Griffith

We all know what it’s like to look for something. Sometimes the thing we’re looking for is lost. We had it….but lost it……so we search for it. Like keys or a receipt or your wallet.

Sometimes the thing we’re looking for isn’t a thing at all. It’s a feeling. Or answers. Or a memory or truth.

I’ve heard of people trying to find themselves. I think they mean they’re trying to figure out who they are and where they fit into this big world and maybe they’re trying to make sense of it all.

We’ve all searched. We all have a sense of longing……..for something we can’t quite name.

So we travel the world and see all there is to see.

We seek adventure and hike the highest peaks and explore deep waters and jump out of airplanes.

We get the PhD from the best university.

We build a career that lets us make plenty of money so we can drive the best cars and dine at the finest restaurants and have an extra house at the beach.

We buy the trendiest outfits, dye our hair, get implants and tattoos, have our stomachs stapled and noses reshaped.

We marry that guy or that girl and when it doesn’t work out we move on to the next one that’s supposed to make us happy.

When those things don’t work we self-medicate to numb the ache.

Different thrill. New place. Bigger house. More stuff.

But the search continues because none of those things, not one of them, eases the ache inside.

The longing remains.

C.S. Lewis said, “If we find ourselves with a desire that nothing in this world can satisfy, the most probable explanation is that we were made for another world.”

For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart. I will be found by you,” declares the Lord….  Jeremiah 29:11-14a  (NIV)

Caper

Open Spaces 

What we do with our time tells the world a lot about us.

How do you spend your time? What does your calendar or planner say about your life?

Last month I didn’t like what my planner said about me. It said I’m busy doing a lot of things. Good things, too. But when I’m not careful about how I plan, I end up doing a lot of additional things and ignoring essential things.

I have to regularly ask myself: is my life busy or bountiful? Manageable or meaningful? Do I value relationships over routine?

We are afflicted with the idea that we aren’t accomplishing anything unless we are rushing here and there, checking off the items on our “to do” list. But a full calendar doesn’t equal an abundant life. I cannot feel the spaciousness of God’s love when I’ve crammed my calendar full.

When I crowd my calendar with a lot of additional unnecessary activities, I crowd out opportunities for good conversations. I push away the chance of a meaningful encounter. I cannot live on purpose when I’m running around trying to accomplish a lot of things. When I’m rushing from one place to the next I don’t see the people around me. I may see them with my eyes, but not with my heart.

I won’t take the time to smile and say hello to the elderly lady behind me. I won’t notice the young boy in the cereal aisle that’s lost his mother.  I’ll rush through a phone call from my sister.

Because I want to live like it matters and after years of doing it the wrong way, I know that I need time in my home with my family and I need solitude. So I must be wise when planning and making commitments. Since I work full-time most of my days are filled but I can be intentional about my evenings.

I’ve learned that I need plenty of blank spaces in my calendar….some unplanned blocks of time…………time to move at soul-speed. The kind of time when I’m still and my heart is open to any kind of heavenly thought that God might send my way.

The unplanned time can be the most meaningful time spent. The kind that allows for a lengthy unrushed phone call with a long distance friend. Or a cozy movie night at home with my husband because the kids are out of the house unexpectedly. Or a nap on a Sunday afternoon.

We all need open spaces in our calendars.

My Live Like It Matters Challenge to you is to leave some open spaces in your planner. Circle them if you have to but leave them blank. See what it does for you. See what it does for the people around you.

Unplanned time is time well spent.

Because how you spend your time matters. And how you plan or don’t plan matters.

Live like it matters.

Photo by Eric Rothermel on Unsplash

Work

Establish the work of our hands for us – yes, establish the work of our hands.  Psalm 90:17 NIV

There are days I like my job. Problems are solved. Questions are answered. I get things done. Learn something new. I feel really good about my work.

Then there are other days. The days I don’t like my job. Solutions to the problems aren’t found. The questions can’t be answered and the piles on my desk remind me of my frustrations more than anything.

And that’s only the work I do for income. There is my work at home, yard work, and volunteer work. Then there’s the work I do pursuing my hobbies. Like writing or running. Some of you paint or build tables or plan parties.

Whatever the kind – work is a big chunk of our lives. It would be ideal if we liked all of our work all of the time. But that’s not how it is. Even if you have a great job that you love, there will be good days and bad days. Productive days and not so much days. Days with happy co-workers and days with grumpy ones. Some of my most challenging work days were when I stayed home with my children!

Your hobby work will produce beautiful masterpieces some days, and other days nothing. The 4 mile run is easy some days, other days the fight for breath is almost too much. The housework is tedious, the yard work strenuous.

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My dad showing the kids how to use a shovel.

Although much of what we face in our work is out of our control, we can choose to do whatever work we are doing excellently and with care.

There is a story of a young mother named Jane. She was in a desperate situation after her husband died suddenly. So desperate that she went down to the river to drown herself. Across the river in a field a young man was plowing with such skill and care that she became absorbed in the sight of it. She stared and stared as the young man worked diligently. Her amazement “turned to thanksgiving, and her thanksgiving to a sense of purpose. She rose, went forth, and lived a long a productive life.”*

A man doing honest work with remarkable care saved Jane’s life.

Do you work like that?

I hope I do. Work is such a significant part of our lives, we should make sure to do it like it matters.

That’s my Live Like It Matters Challenge to you today. Work like it matters.

Think your job doesn’t matter? Too menial? Think no one notices? It matters to someone. It matters more than you know. I was inspired by the work of a garbage man and shared it in The Extra Mile.

No matter the job – you can do it so that it inspires others.

Hairdressers and accountants and drive-thru order takers and pallet makers and bridal dress consultants and process technicians and movie actors and authors and carpenters and lawn care techs and assembly line workers and engineers.

Your work matters. My work matters.

Work like it matters.

If a man is called to be a streetsweeper, he should sweep streets, even as Michelangelo painted or Beethoven composed music, or Shakespeare wrote poetry.  He should sweep streets so well that all the host of heaven and earth will pause to say, here lived a great streetsweeper who did his job well.”                                                                             Martin Luther King, Jr.

*This story is originally told in Os Guinness’ book The Call and retold by Mark Buchanan in The Rest of God.

In response to the Daily Post’s Vigor.

Volunteer

Volunteering is a really good thing and it goes along with my Live Like It Matters Challenge so…………..

My challenge to you is to volunteer. Regularly.

Go to your city’s animal shelter and see if you can help walk the dogs. And maybe you can even do something with the cats if you want to.

Ask the principal of any local school, especially those in less affluent areas, and just see all the projects you can help with. I’ve cleaned out flower beds, painted over graffiti, cleaned and painted bathrooms, fixed broken bathroom stall doors, picked up trash after several football games (football fans are some snack loving, trash making people), and organized and served a free breakfast for a teacher in-service training.

Most hospitals or nursing homes have a volunteer program. Your local library, too. Check them out and see if you can find something to do.

Even if the nursing home doesn’t have a volunteer “program” check with the administrators to see if you can visit the lonely people there. If you have kids, take them with you because lonely old people love young people. I’m fortunate enough to have two daughters that absolutely love old people. Can you sing or play an instrument? Perform for the patients while they’re eating their meals in the dining hall. Can’t carry a tune? Then definitely don’t sing but the ladies like to have their nails painted. And all of them like to play games. Or sit and talk with them. That’s their favorite thing anyway.

Help serve a meal at the local food kitchen. Stuff envelopes at your local campaign office. Clear out some overgrown trails with a team of forest lovers. Organize a trash pick up at your workplace and use the lunch hour to clear the street of garbage.

There are thousands of ways to volunteer.

I am fortunate enough to be part of a local church that does all of these things and more. We seek out opportunities to serve our city and the surrounding communities and we’ve made and will continue to make a significant impact where we live.

It doesn’t matter where or how…..just do something. Volunteer.

Because it matters. Because you matter and he matters and she matters.

Live like it matters.

Thanks

This is the 3rd in a series of challenges I am issuing in my Live Like it Matters Challenge. Each week you are challenged to do something to make a positive difference in the lives of those around you, in the place around you, wherever you are.

Why?  Because the world needs you and me to see those around us and to connect with them.

For 2 weeks we were challenged to say hello to strangers.thank+you I had some eye-opening encounters that only intensified my need to encourage you to live on purpose….to live like it matters. It also affirmed why I need to be intentional about connecting with others.

This week the challenge will take a bit more thought than saying hello but it’s still simple.

Write a thank you note. Easy, right?  I know what you’re thinking. You’re thinking you’ll send a quick text to your friend thanking her for listening to you complain about your job the other day. Or you’ll send one of those free E-cards.

Nope – that’s not the challenge. The challenge is to write a thank you note with a pen on real paper or in a real card. Then………mail it!

Yes, mail it. Just think how special your friend will feel when she gets that card in the mail. Within the pile of junk mail will be a little card personally addressed to her. She’ll wonder about it, open it, and read it. She’ll feel appreciated and then smile.

Maybe instead of a friend, you’ll write a note to your brother, or your parents, or a teacher that encouraged you in high school. Your spouse, a child, a co-worker, or the guy at the deli-counter that goes the extra mile to help you.

I know what this means for most of us. We have to look up an address on WhitePages.com or text the person to ask the address or search even further. It’s okay. And you may have to buy stamps. That’s okay, too. They’re sold most anywhere now.

All of this will be totally worth it to the person receiving the thank you. It will be worth it to you, too, because you’ve made someone know they matter. You’ve let someone know they’re valued. You’ve done something good on purpose.

Who are you sending a thank you note?

“Feeling good about your life, but not expressing a heartfelt ‘thank you,’ is like wrapping a gift for someone and never giving it to them.”  Chip Conley

Keep Saying Hello

Last week I challenged you to say hello to 5 strangers. The point of the challenge is for us to become more aware of those around us. I hope it helped you do just that and I encourage you to continue with it.  hello

I had a couple of interesting encounters but mostly I say “hey” and smile and the other person does the same. Some people don’t say anything but smile as they walk past me. I’ve noticed if I’m waiting in line and say hello a conversation usually takes place.

I met Edna at my local library. She’s an older woman with white hair. She told me she can’t type very well.

I also met Mr.Grocery Guy. Although I didn’t get his name, I found out that he’s working on his degree in finance and he turned down a great intern opportunity to marry the love of his life. He and his love are now divorced after 2 years of marriage. I told him I was sorry and he told me it was okay. He is back on track with his finance career goals. I learned all of this while he was helping me get my groceries to my car. I told him good luck with his endeavors and he said a hearty “thank you”.

The most interesting conversation was with a young mother in the parking lot at the library. I noticed her talking on her cellphone very loudly and I smiled at her. When I came out of the library she stopped me as she was driving out of the parking lot. She apologized for her shouting. She explained that she doesn’t always do that. Then she shared more about her situation. Her husband is out of work and instead of going with her to look for a job like he was supposed to, he went with his friends to make a drug run. I put my hand on hers and asked her name, then her husband’s name. I told her I was sorry about what she’s going through and she drove off.

I’m unsure of why she felt like she needed to tell me all of that.

Except this: she wants someone to know. She wants to feel less alone in her fight. Her heart is breaking for her children and she needs to know someone cares. She needs hope.

Do these encounters matter? I think so. I know they matter to me. They keep me connected to others and their hurts. While I’m worrying what to fix for dinner the young mother from the library parking lot is worrying for the safety of her children. That shakes me up. It forces me to get out of my comfortable middle class world and get out there and do something…..anything that can help give people hope.

There’s lots of ways to help. Serving meals to the homeless, giving to your local church or non-profit that help those in need, volunteering at your local schools, tutoring kids, mentoring younger people, visiting nursing home residents are all ways to make a difference. Or you could buy a house in a deprived neighborhood, fix it up, and live there. I have friends who are doing this. They’re living right where the help is needed, building relationships and making a difference in that neighborhood.

It’s called living on purpose. It’s called living like it matters.

And it can start with hello.

I will issue another challenge soon.  Until then, keep saying hello.

Say Hello

Today, I’m beginning a new feature on my blog called the “Live Like it Matters Challenge“.

Each week I will issue a challenge to you to do something to make a positive difference in the lives of those around you, in the place around you, wherever you are.

This challenge is for me, too.  Because I forget to make sure to be aware of those around me. To see them. To smile or nod.

But I don’t want to forget.  I want to make a difference.  I want to live on purpose.

Unfortunately, I’ve been the one in the forever long check out line at the store, staring blankly at the air, unaware of those around me. Not thinking about the elderly lady behind me or the mom with 2 restless toddlers in her cart whining to go home.  Not smiling, not saying anything. Just there. Missing an opportunity to do something kind or good. Even if it’s just to say, “Hello, how are you?”

FullSizeRender (28)And that’s the challenge this week. SAY HELLO to five strangers. Look them straight in the eyes and say hello. Make sure you’re smiling, too. It may feel strange at first and the stranger may think you’re weird and not respond. That’s fine. You tried.

Try again. Then again. And again. See what happens?

I bet you end up having a nice conversation with one of those strangers this week. I bet you make someone’s day just by smiling and speaking.

Because when you acknowledge someone, you’re telling them they matter.

And they do matter.

And you matter and what you do matters.

So live on purpose.

Live like it matters.  Say hello!

Share with me how the strangers responded.  What was your experience?

Maybe you do this all the time.  I’d love to hear about it.

 

In response to the Daily Post’s Prompt Break the Silence.

Live Like it Matters

If a man is called to be a streetsweeper, he should sweep streets, even as Michelangelo painted or Beethoven composed music, or Shakespeare wrote poetry.  He should sweep streets so well that all the host of heaven and earth will pause to say, here lived a great streetsweeper who did his job well.”  Martin Luther King, Jr.

For a long time I’ve felt a tension between what I have to do and what I want to do. Not because I don’t enjoy the “have to” part.  The “have to” part is really good. It just doesn’t leave much time for the “want to”.  I have a divine discontent deep within and I desire with all my heart to make a difference. To not waste my life.

What if I never get to do what I really want?  Will my life matter?

Yes. Because I choose to live like it matters.

I will love and take care of my family and friends like it matters.  My sisters and I were with Dad in the hospital when he passed and it mattered. Especially to Mom, because she couldn’t be there.

And we were with Mom at home when she took her last breath.  That mattered to all of us more than we even know now.

I will do my best at taking care of all things financial for the construction company where I work because it matters to my boss, my coworkers, our vendors, and all the people who enter our buildings.

I forgave the friend who betrayed me because it matters. It matters to her and me and our families.

The day to day living matters. What you think is the mundane may be someone’s most meaningful moment.  The random conversation in the grocery store.  Finally having that couple over for dinner and good conversation will matter to them more than you know.  The time you spend talking to your kids.  Serving a meal at the local homeless shelter.  Calling your parents.  Smiling at the weird looking guy at the gas station.  It all matters.

There are no small lives.  You matter and what you do matters.

So live on purpose.

Live like it matters.