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The New Site

| Marie Griffith

Ready or not, here it is. The new website launched. It didn’t happen quite the way I wanted it to happen, but it happened nevertheless.

I worked on the new website in all my spare time and, what feels like, time I didn’t have. My lunch hour, the minutes before a meeting, the time in the waiting room of the doctor’s office, and my free evenings were filled with website work. A lot is involved in launching a new site, and I wanted it to be perfect. I tweaked pages, changed words, added widgets and photos, and updated posts.

If you follow this site and like what you see, please visit my new site and follow. All of you have meant a lot to my journey and I’d like for us to continue to connect.

Thank you from the bottom of my heart for the encouragement, the conversations, your blog posts, and just being some of the neatest people on the planet!

My new site is still called Live Like It Matters. Click here to see it and let me know you found me.

 

 

 

What’s This All About?

| Marie Griffith

The new website is coming along and we’re almost there. In the meantime, I’ll share the reason I’m doing this in the first place.

Fifteen years ago I was a young mother at the end of another exhausting day, and I wondered, is this it?

I graduated college, worked years at a great company, and quit a promising career to be home with my children to wipe counters, noses and bottoms all day?

Today, I’m sitting in my office with piles of paper scattered across my desk, emails to answer, phone calls to make, and numbers to crunch. And I wonder, is this it?

I know I’m not the only one. You feel the same way. The restlessness, the divine discontent, a desire within your heart to make a difference. We all want to know our lives count.

I was in my 20s when I read John Maxwell’s book “Developing the Leader Within You”. The most important words of the entire book were these:

Sociologists tell us that even the most introverted person will influence 10,000 people in his or her lifetime.

I was astounded. To think that I would impact 10,000 or more people in my lifetime was amazing and humbling.

The 10,000 statistic is a pre-social media number. It’s not a stretch to guess that the most introverted person will impact an exponentially greater number of people in his or her lifetime. Fifty thousand, maybe even 100,000 with Facebook, Twitter, blogging, and all the other ways of connecting with others.

The statistic might have changed but the main point of John Maxwell’s book is a timeless truth: at its most basic, leadership is influence.

In other words, you matter. I matter. And what we do matters. 

That’s why I’m passionate about Live Like it Matters.

A couple of years ago, I issued Live Like It Matters challenges on my blog to remind myself and others of the significance of our day-to-day interactions. The challenges connect our desire to make a difference with our everyday lives. The challenges include:

  • say hello to a stranger
  • write a note to a coworker.
  • give a 40% tip the next time you eat at a restaurant
  • volunteer at a local charity for a day/a week/regularly

The challenges prompt us to look for opportunities to live like it matters right where we are.

Because some of the thousands we’ll reach are the people we meet day in and day out. One of yours may be the tired unnamed waitress that served you lunch on Sunday, a young man in your daughter’s class struggling with his identity, the homeless couple who sit on the curb near the mall you drive past each day, or the flustered UPS guy hauling heavy boxes inside your office building each morning.

We don’t have to be entertainers, politicians, professional athletes or authors to touch thousands. We don’t need Twitter followers, websites, or Facebook pages. It’s those of us in our workplaces, at the schools, and in lines at the grocery store checkouts who make the difference. We can live like it matters at the bank, the park, or the gym.

We live like it matters when we change diapers, wipe snotty noses, and wash dishes. Take heart, tired young parent, take heart. Home is the best place to live like it matters.

When we live like it matters our routines are rich with opportunity, the mundane is meaningful, and our lives turn from ordinary to extraordinary.

My writing, my blog, my website….all of it is about learning to live like it matters and encouraging us in it.

I’ll issue challenges occasionally and continue the regular features, like Monday School and Beauty Break.

I’ll still write just to write, too. I hope it will give you hope, make you ponder a thought you never have before, unlock a memory, see someone in a new way, or make you feel less alone.

Anne Lamott puts it this way, “a writer always tries, I think, to be part of the solution, to understand a little about life and to pass it on”.

This is me passing it on.

When the new website launches, this website will eventually redirect to the new site, but I’m not sure if new posts will show up in the WP reader. I’m still learning about this.

If you want to be sure to catch the new site, new challenges and all my new stuff please leave a comment and tell me you want to subscribe to the new site and I’ll add you to my email followers. 

Photo by Mr Cup / Fabien Barral on Unsplash

Love Me Tender

| Marie Griffith

Eleven days into my Lenten journey and I realize I’ve slowed down……a little. I’ve allowed for more quiet time in the morning….reading, praying, listening and reflecting, but I’m still trying to find a consistent soul-speed.

I’m reading a daily online Lent devotional and the Gospel of Mark during my Lenten journey. This week the story of a man with a withered hand in Chapter 3 struck a chord. Or maybe it hit a nerve.

Jesus walked into the synagogue and noticed a man with a withered hand. Some versions say his hand was shriveled. Others use the word deformed or crippled. Whatever word described it, the man’s right hand was useless. The same story in Luke 6:6-11 says Jesus asked the man to stand in front of the crowd.

Jesus wanted the people to see the man and his gnarled hand. Perhaps some in the crowd were moved to compassion. Some wondered what Jesus would do. The Pharisees and scribes looked for a way to accuse Jesus.

In all three Gospel accounts of the story, Jesus questioned the crowd.

“Is it lawful to do good on the Sabbath or to do harm?”

“If your sheep fell into the ditch on the Sabbath, wouldn’t you lift it out?”

“On the Sabbath should we save someone’s life or destroy it?”

The four words at the end of verse 4 in Mark’s version say it all.

“But they were silent.”

No answers. Not a word. Only silence. The religious leaders were unyielding. The sight of the disabled man and the pointed questions did nothing to soften their hearts. They were consumed with the idea of catching Jesus in breaking the Sabbath.

I wonder about the onlookers, though. The other ones in the synagogue. Why didn’t one of them answer Jesus and say, “I would rescue my sheep” or “It’s lawful to save a life any day of the week.” Had they heard the man-made rules about Sabbath for so long they forgot what God said? Were they scared into silence? Afraid of what the religious leaders would do if they spoke up?

Verse 5 says, “And Jesus looked around at them with anger, grieved at their hardness of heart….” 

Then Jesus told the man to stretch out his hand and it was restored.

Such a work of mercy should have tendered hearts and caused amazement and faith, but they wouldn’t be moved. They persisted in unbelief and set out to destroy Jesus. The ones determined to uphold the law missed the whole point of it: to love God and love people.

Are our hearts hard? Are we unmoved? Do we value man-made rules and traditions over people? Are we determined to move our agendas forward even when it means hindering others’ journey toward God? Are we holding onto status or position or reputation instead of trusting God?

Father, show us our hearts. Reveal the deepest places – the ones we try not to see. Make our hearts tender so we are moved by what moves You. May we love you wholeheartedly and may we see those around us the way You see them.

And I will give you a new heart, and a new spirit I will put within you. And I will remove the heart of stone from your flesh and give you a heart of flesh.  Ezekiel 36:26

 

Photo by Jamez Picard on Unsplash

 

 

 

Morning Coffee

| Marie Griffith

I woke up Saturday morning later than usual. I walked into the kitchen and started the coffee to brew like I always do. I had just enough time to drink a cup while I talked with my husband before I met a friend for our long Saturday run.

Lately I’ve been treating myself to a cinnamon almond milk macchiato after the miles on Saturdays and I look forward to it. But I didn’t need to stop for coffee this Saturday. Before I left the house I realized there was coffee left in the pot so I hurriedly poured it into my Yeti cup to keep it warm and brought it with me.

After the run, I said goodbye to my running partner, opened the car door and smelled the aroma of coffee. As I started the car I wondered why there was so much…….I brewed the same amount I’ve always brewed. It took me a minute to realize why I had a Yeti full of coffee. My daughter didn’t drink her portion like she usually does on Saturday morning.

She was on her honeymoon.

Like I always do, I brewed enough coffee for me and my daughter. She enjoys coffee as much as I do and she’s up early on Saturdays for her work. We sit and talk as we sip our coffee until one of us says, “I have to get ready after I tell you this”.

We both love good conversation and our morning ones are some of the best. So good that sometimes, we can barely pull away.

Her morning coffee routine will be different now. Mine too.

But it will be good.

Growing and changing.

Endings and beginnings.

These are necessary and good and beautiful.

 

 

Photo by John-Mark Smith from Pexels

Blink
 

Keeping the Promises

| Marie Griffith

Laughter floated in the air as food was prepared and decorations set. Flowers filled the entry ways, overflowed from vases on the mantel, tables and all around our home. Friends and family gathered yesterday to shower my daughter with blessings as she prepares to enter this new season of life and celebrate the upcoming marriage to her fiance. What a joyous time it was. We saw faces we hadn’t seen in years. Some came from far away, others from down the road. My sweet aunt who was married to her love for 74 years was there. Some newly marrieds and some who will be someday came too.

Along with lots of wonderful gifts for her home, our friends and family brought their love and blessings with them. My friend told us a beautiful story and shared some things she wish she’d known as a young bride. Then I prayed for my daughter.

It didn’t take long for me to settle on what to pray for her in her marriage. Her father and I celebrated 23 years of marriage the day before her shower so I was thinking of our story as I was thinking about how to pray.

Twenty three years ago in a small wedding chapel in Tennessee we vowed to love each other.

We promised to love each other when times were good and when they weren’t. To love each other in times of sickness and wellness, during feast or famine, and highs and lows.

We laugh now at the kids we were then because we thought we had it figured out. Now we know we still don’t have it figured out.

But we’re learning. We’re growing together, loving each other, and getting better and better at it. We’re keeping the promises.

We’ve experienced abundant joy and faced tragedy; enjoyed many blessings and walked through painful seasons. And we’ve done it for 23 years.

We’re better because of each other and for each other.

I began the prayer for my daughter with Ephesians 4:32. Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.

It’s not the typical marriage verse but I know from 23 years that when my husband and I are practicing this, we’re doing well. When we’re not following it, things aren’t as good as they can be.

I prayed for her the same things I ask for myself:

“Father, thank You that we can come to You with confidence and know You hear us. Thank You for our friends and family gathered here to celebrate our daughter’s life. And thank You for the divine gift of marriage.

Father, You promise to give us all we need to do what You’ve called us to do. Draw her near to You. May she look to You for guidance and wisdom as she grows into the woman You’ve called her to be.

You call us to kind actions and words but Your desire is not that we just do kind acts but that our hearts are tender which leads to kindness. God, keep her heart tender. Let her eyes be fixed on You and may she remember Your kindness and extravagant love toward her.

Give her a wholehearted love for You, Father. Because as her love for You grows, so will the love for her husband.”

And we all said, “Amen.”

“Love is not merely a feeling. It is a deep unity maintained by the will and deliberately strengthened by habit, reinforced by the grace which both partners ask, and receive, from God.”   C.S. Lewis

photo by Markie Pearson Photography

Extravagant

The New Kid

| Marie Griffith

The day I turned 12 years old, my family moved from our small town in Alabama to a big town in Tennessee. I lived in an unfamiliar house in a peculiar neighborhood and all my friends were too far away. A few weeks later I walked into my new school wearing a new dress because that was the rule. Girls wore dresses and boys wore collared, button-down shirts tucked in their pants. I never had these rules before and this made everything feel even stranger.

My classes went well though. I was late to Mrs. Bradshaw’s 7th grade English class because I had trouble finding the classroom. I listened intently to the teachers and was eager to learn, especially Tennessee History. Then there was lunch. I hadn’t thought about dreading it until I stood in line waiting for the glob of potatoes to fill the square on the top left corner of my tray. As I finished going through the line, I glanced around to see the entire lunchroom.

I stood there. Awkwardly. In a dress I hated. With a hideous hair cut. Holding a lunch I didn’t want to eat in a place I didn’t want to be.  IMG_5631

But like every new or uncomfortable situation I’ve been in since then, I made it through and here I am to tell the story.

We’ve all been there. Maybe not in the 7th grade with your hair cut too short wearing a plaid dress, but you’ve been the new kid or employee in training. The first-timer in an obstacle race, a freshman at college, the rookie gym member, or a newcomer to a writer’s conference…….feeling out of place, unsure and less than.

When we’re new to something we ask questions. That’s how we grow from not knowing to knowing. Is this seat taken? Which way to the math and science building? How can I strengthen my back muscles? Where do I get my timing chip? What do I say to the literary agent?

So we learn where to go and what to say and the next day or the next time it’s easier…..we’re not as unsure. We do that over and over and without even thinking about it we know what we’re doing and we’re confident in it. We’re winning the races, or killing our workouts at the gym, acing the college classes, or writing a book.

Changing circumstances, new experiences, and different environments are normal parts of our lives. Some of them we choose. Others we never would.

The best way to handle any of them: moment to moment, one foot in front of the other, with an open heart and a willingness to learn all we can. We’ll do it well sometimes. Other times we’ll fall flat on our faces. But it’s good either way if we’ve learned something, made a friend, solved a problem or faced a fear.

The more we do this, the better we get at it. We remember how we conquered the awkwardness and insecurity and it gives us courage to try other things. We welcome new opportunities. We’re not afraid to ask hard questions and we go against the flow when needed. We’re willing to be different and we don’t mind walking through difficult circumstances. Sometimes we even choose it because it’s the right thing to do.

But we do it with lots of grace and always thinking of others along the way because that’s the point. All of it means nothing……our learning, our serving, our working, our creating……..it means nothing if we’re not loving others.

I wish I could tell you who I sat with at lunch that day. Maybe I found out we had to sit with our homeroom class. Maybe someone called me over to sit with them. I do remember making lots of friends in 7th grade but I don’t remember anything from my Tennessee History class.

Let’s not forget how it feels to be the new kid and let’s make a newbie feel a little more comfortable when given the chance.

“Walk with me and work with me – watch how I do it. Learn the unforced rhythms of grace. I won’t lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you. Keep company with me and you’ll learn to live freely and lightly.”     Matthew 11:29-30 (MSG)

 

Face Your Fear

| Marie Griffith

Earlier this week, a story I wrote was published in Shattered Magazine. This is a first ever for me and something I’ve wanted and waited for a long time.

But I almost didn’t write the story.

The stories I write are remembered ones…..the ones I’ve lived and felt. This one was going to be an altogether different way of writing a story and I wasn’t sure I could do it.

Instead of letting my fear of failure scare me out of trying, I took it on. I knew I would learn from the experience even if the story wasn’t published. The online managing editor worked with me during the process and I was right:  I learned so much!

First, I realized I have a lot more to learn about writing for publications like Shattered Magazine. I also learned the importance of doing things in spite of being afraid of them. This is one of those lessons I seem to have to relearn again and again.

During the process of writing the story I made another decision. I’m a writer so I’m going to write. I will submit a book proposal at the speaking/writing conference I’m attending in July.  This is another new and scary thing for me but I know whatever the outcome, I will learn from the process.

And that’s a win-win!

I urge you to do something new and scary this week. Set a goal, move toward a dream, make a plan, have that conversation you’ve been putting off, ask the question, start the project. Face your fears and go for it!

Because it matters!

Live like it matters.

The story I wrote is about Zach Williams and his journey to freedom. You can read the story here.

 

 

Broken

| Marie Griffith

Every year we go to the beach to gather with friends and family. One of our favorite things is to look for shells. The shells that catch my eye are the broken
pieces….like these. The ones that have been broken so long and been tumbled around in the ocean so much that their edges are smoothed out and rounded.

God notices the broken too. Broken ones like you and me. The ones with shattered dreams and splintered lives. Those of us wondering what’s next because everything we’ve known before is gone. The weary ones and sick ones and those of us asking what it’s all for. The ones of us with doubts and fears. Those with regrets and mistakes and failures stacked up high. Those of us on the edge of something new but scared to take the leap.

He sees you. But more than that….He loves you.

Give Him your broken heart. All of it. Your questions too. All of them.

He makes beautiful things out of broken ones.

“My sacrifice, O God, is a broken spirit; a broken and contrite heart you, God, will not despise. ”  Psalm 51:17 NIV

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Here’s how I repurposed
some of the broken shells I’ve found…….a frame for one of our beach pictures.

No Small Lives

| Marie Griffith

We’re six days into the New Year and that means the ads you see on your screens and hear on your radio are all about making changes. Improving our diets. Getting fit. Taking control of our finances. Organizing our homes. Changing this and changing that.

Marketers know that with the new year our desire for a new way or a better thing or at least a change in the way we look or feel is heightened. We want our lives to be different …..we want them to be better.

But if we pay close attention to that desire we realize it’s more than that. We want to know there’s a purpose to all of this. We want to know we’re making a difference. We want to know our lives matter.

And they do.

You’re 1 in 7,000,000,000 people on this planet but there’s One who knows your name. He created you (Psalm 139:13). He is the One who gives you breath (Genesis 2:7). And he knows the number of hairs on your head (Matthew 10:30).

Our lives matter and so do our choices. Who we are at home and at work and the gym. It matters. What we do in the grocery store or the bank and at the salon. It matters.

You don’t have to be an athlete, an entertainer, a politician or author. It’s those of us in our workplaces, at the schools, and in lines at the store checkouts that make the difference.

There are no small lives. “For in him, we live and move and have our being” (Acts 17:28)

And it’s the day to day living where it counts the most.

Living like it matters is when you choose to smile at the disgruntled guy in line at the express checkout and letting him go ahead of you since he only has 3 items compared to your 14.

It might be calling your parents when you’d rather sit and watch your favorite show. Or fixing a meal for your neighbor. It’s also when you don’t overcrowd your calendar so that you are available to your teenagers just in case they want to talk.

What you think is mundane may be someone’s most meaningful moment. No matter who and where you are, you can live like it matters.

That’s the most important change you can make in 2017.

Photo courtesy of nina lindgren